I hate recommending things I haven’t properly tried. It’s this inflexible position that has made writing a Christmas gift guide extremely difficult this year: there were things I planned to test and hopefully consequently recommend, but after spending all my money in Japan (plus borrowing some money and spending that as well), I’m not going to be buying much this month.

To make a virtue out of necessity – or a blogpost out of my lack of self-control – I decided to talk about things I’d like to receive, but in a much more delusional manner than last time, when everything was tried and tested and within my budget. Some stuff on this list is ridiculously expensive, some might be crap, but it’s possible you’ll find something interesting in here.

1. Coffee table books. I’m notoriously difficult to buy books for: if it’s something I might like, I probably own it already. I hardly ever buy coffee table books, however, and I know there are actually fantastic ones out there. Viktor Wynd’s Cabinet of Wonders and Bals: Legendary Costume Balls of the Twentieth Century have been pointed out to me by trustworthy sources.

2. Frederic Malle travel sprays. The good news is that the beautiful Malle fragrances can be bought in individual 10ml vials. The bad news (well, rumor) is that the scents will be reformulated now that the brand is owned by Estee Lauder. So I should get as many as I can – Une Fleur de Cassie and Carnal Flower are on top of my list.

3. Overose candles. It’s one of the fundamental rules of the universe that no gift guide is complete without a scented candle. Usually it’s from Diptyque. Overose is a new Parisian brand with a selection of interesting scents and emphasis on sustainability. I have no clue if the candles are any good, but look at that packaging! It has been made especially for me.

4. Bang & Olufsen wireless headphones. B&O will always have a special place in my heart, as my Danish boyfriend used to have their CD-player. In 1996, it seemed like the classiest thing ever. Now I’m lusting after the beige leather wireless headphones that are perfect, if you disregard the price. Please comment, if you know a more affordable alternative, because there are all those intellectual podcasts I would be listening to if I only owned pretty headphones. True fact.

5. Active Botanical Serum by Vintner’s Daughter. Despite owning most skincare products ever produced, there is one I still desperately need. Vintner’s Daughter oil serum is loved by everybody who knows anything about skin. It’s also expensive and always sold out.

6. Charlotte Tilbury powder. And now for something practical. No, I’m not kidding. You know how people buy stuff that excites them and not the stuff they need (and by people I mean me)? Well, instead of another cleanser or lipstick, I should get a powder. I wouldn’t use it much, but sometimes it really is a good idea to set the makeup. Many people say Tilbury’s Airbrush Flawless Finish Powder is (one of) the best – even the grumpy people over at Beautypedia gave it five stars.

7. Tom Dixon Plum Cocktail Shaker. This is almost as practical as the Tilbury powder. I like interesting cocktails, but as I don’t own a shaker, I’m pretty much limited to making drinks that work with vigorous stirring only. Which probably explains my G&T consumption levels. I haven’t bought a shaker because I haven’t found an aesthetically pleasing one, but this is no longer an issue.

8. Neela Vermeire Trayee. One of the things on this list that I know, which makes it completely incomprehensible why I don’t yet own a bottle. This is a strong contender for the Best Use of Incense Award – and I don’t even like incense that much.

9. Rituel de Fille makeup. While I’ve been using niche skincare for years, my makeup is still heavy on big mainstream brands. Time to change that. Rituel de Fille is a slightly witchy American green-ish beauty brand that has been praised by Lisa Eldridge. They do great, unusual colours and can be bought at Cult Beauty (or directly from their site, if you are geographically lucky).

10. Roksanda Margot dress. I did mention this was a wishlist, right? Of a delusional variety? Good. If I was still working in the private sector where Christmas bonuses are a thing, this is the dress I would buy. I loved it when it first launched in 2012, in bright pink, and I love it now when it comes in white, black and this gorgeous corally shade. I don’t see this love fading any time soon.

11. Brass pineapples. Because everyone needs brass pineapples.