This weekend, I woke up to the news that Chadwick Boseman had died. I have to admit, with some embarrassment, that the only role I ever saw him in was T’Challa. While this is surely not enough to properly appreciate him as an actor, it is entirely sufficient for knowing that he made history. I have never had much patience for people who dismiss the superhero genre by default, but not seeing the importance of the Black Panther movie for modern culture is not a sign of refined sensibility, it is just wilful ignorance. 

Personally, I have no doubt that it is one of the lasting landmarks of early 21th century cinema. Not only because of the nearly all-black cast, the centrality of Africa, the role of women and many other things rightfully lauded about the movie, but also because of the resources put behind the production and marketing of it. Black artists have always done brilliant things, they have just not received the attention and backing they deserve. (The reason I bring out this aspect is not to praise Marvel and Disney for something that should be normal. It is to demonstrate that something in the society has shifted and that Black Panther was there to seize that moment.)

But back to Boseman. Let me come clean and say that initially, there were other things in Black Panther I loved more. I really liked him, but I ADORED Dora Milaje, Killmonger and the worldbuilding. It wasn’t until I watched Boseman on the press circuit that I understood how essential he was for the entire project. Because with a role as iconic and loaded as this, you cannot just have an actor who looks and acts the part on screen. You need someone who can handle all this pressure off screen and be the equivalent of the king in the real world.

Watching Boseman talk about the meaning of Wakanda, the use of African accents and different cultures in the movie is enlightening, inspiring and moving. I was rewatching his interview with Trevor Noah from two yers ago (I remember thinking then that he looked so slender…) and I recommend you take these 11 minutes of your life and watch it as well. When he talks about giving T’Challa the Xhosa clicks and how he insisted that an African accent can carry a movie, you see exactly why he had to play that role. 

I have a theory that actors who do superhero movies do them either because they are fanboys or fangirls to begin with or for the money and profile Marvel (and DC) roles tend to bring these days. I mean, for all my love for the genre, it’s usually not the best outlet for highly nuanced artistic performances. But I also have a theory that Boseman doesn’t fall into either of these two camps. He strikes me as someone who carefully weighed the problematic aspects of these films – and still wrestled with them to a certain extent even after the fact – and decided that in this case, it was worth doing. Because there genuinely was purpose and meaning in this project beyond bodysuits and special effects.

His death and his decision to keep his illness private of course make his choices and conduct even more poignant. I am not a particularly dignified, humble, selfless or spiritual person myself, and I’m suspicious of people who claim they are. I do, however, have boundless respect for those who do in fact embody and live these qualities.

And this is why I am walking around Brussels in the rain, listening to the Black Panther soundtrack and crying into my mask like I have lost someone very close to me. Or a true King.